The Devil in the Wishing Well..
MAJOR SIGHS.
one of the suckiest feelings in the world - knowing that school is actually starting tommorow. it sucks soo bad that i'm starting to wonder how i yearned for school to start. i was a dork back then. maybe i'm a cooler dork now. hmm, nahhhh..
i'm online but no one seems to want to talk to me. oh well, sometimes it's like, you GOTS to do the first move. but this one i can live with, it ain't a big issue for me.
i better make this quick, get plenty of snooze hours, for the big day tommorow, *STANDS UP SHOUTS*. what makes it even a more craptasticier day is the knowledge we haven't paid 6 months, THAT's HALF A YEAR, of tuition fees. all i hope is that we pay SOON...you see, that's one of the things what i hate about my dad's business..sometimes it's so damn slow that you must suffer the embaressment and oh, the SHAME.
maybe that's why i'm looking for a better future..maybe new and temporary surroundings are starting to take an influence on me..i want to move school..to establish a new me..but maybe that's for the sake of other people...i realize that i really damn care what other people think of me..and that's one of the issues that i'm willing to change this year..to not care what other people think of me..don't fret myself worrying about what they tell themselves..wish me luck on that btw..
ooh, i realized i haven't been slacking off in the summer vacation...i learned a new equation..
MONEY = SECURITY
money can't buy love. money can't necessarily buy happiness. but money isn't all that bad..just as long as you spent it wisely. but happiness is like, a cousin to security. which we all need in our lives. if i try to explain it, it's going to be all like, 'yeah, money buys you security. and security i mean food, a place to sleep in, and all that. but it's more complex than yet if you're living in this world. sometimes you need it to FIT IN. seriously, people have relentlessly stressed themselves out (well, in my theory, only in their minds cause they're so good in hiding it with well worded sentences) in that ultimate momentum to FIT IN. sometimes to FIT IN it can be alright, but since i never really quite FIT IN, i really don't know. what i'm most worried about is that IF EVER i get the chance to FIT IN, it wouldn't be wasted. like, it didn't turn out like it expected to.
please mind, it's all in the mind of me. it swirls with paranoai (screw that) with lucid knowledge that it actually is paranoia (screw that again) all with a mental image of myself in a third person. like, i'm standing there looking at myself typing this, OR that i'm pretending to see it through the eyes of a publisher who'd a MILLION IN ONE chances actually read this blog out of the MILLIONS OF MILLIONS countless blogs out there and actually liking what he read. hahahaha. it's all me, it's all me.
maybe it actually works better with a dose of sarcasm here and there.
okayy toodles.much s(w)inging.
OK if i continue to live like this, i should really start working on my originals. not quoting after someone else.
leave it all black and white where it was controversial before. hey, it could happen before it could happen again.
one of the suckiest feelings in the world - knowing that school is actually starting tommorow. it sucks soo bad that i'm starting to wonder how i yearned for school to start. i was a dork back then. maybe i'm a cooler dork now. hmm, nahhhh..
i'm online but no one seems to want to talk to me. oh well, sometimes it's like, you GOTS to do the first move. but this one i can live with, it ain't a big issue for me.
i better make this quick, get plenty of snooze hours, for the big day tommorow, *STANDS UP SHOUTS*. what makes it even a more craptasticier day is the knowledge we haven't paid 6 months, THAT's HALF A YEAR, of tuition fees. all i hope is that we pay SOON...you see, that's one of the things what i hate about my dad's business..sometimes it's so damn slow that you must suffer the embaressment and oh, the SHAME.
maybe that's why i'm looking for a better future..maybe new and temporary surroundings are starting to take an influence on me..i want to move school..to establish a new me..but maybe that's for the sake of other people...i realize that i really damn care what other people think of me..and that's one of the issues that i'm willing to change this year..to not care what other people think of me..don't fret myself worrying about what they tell themselves..wish me luck on that btw..
ooh, i realized i haven't been slacking off in the summer vacation...i learned a new equation..
MONEY = SECURITY
money can't buy love. money can't necessarily buy happiness. but money isn't all that bad..just as long as you spent it wisely. but happiness is like, a cousin to security. which we all need in our lives. if i try to explain it, it's going to be all like, 'yeah, money buys you security. and security i mean food, a place to sleep in, and all that. but it's more complex than yet if you're living in this world. sometimes you need it to FIT IN. seriously, people have relentlessly stressed themselves out (well, in my theory, only in their minds cause they're so good in hiding it with well worded sentences) in that ultimate momentum to FIT IN. sometimes to FIT IN it can be alright, but since i never really quite FIT IN, i really don't know. what i'm most worried about is that IF EVER i get the chance to FIT IN, it wouldn't be wasted. like, it didn't turn out like it expected to.
please mind, it's all in the mind of me. it swirls with paranoai (screw that) with lucid knowledge that it actually is paranoia (screw that again) all with a mental image of myself in a third person. like, i'm standing there looking at myself typing this, OR that i'm pretending to see it through the eyes of a publisher who'd a MILLION IN ONE chances actually read this blog out of the MILLIONS OF MILLIONS countless blogs out there and actually liking what he read. hahahaha. it's all me, it's all me.
maybe it actually works better with a dose of sarcasm here and there.
okayy toodles.much s(w)inging.
OK if i continue to live like this, i should really start working on my originals. not quoting after someone else.
leave it all black and white where it was controversial before. hey, it could happen before it could happen again.
posted by Jellybean at 7:22 AM
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