When Heart Stops Beating..
I’ll be there when your heart stops beating.
My current song movie soundtrack. OK, I have an excuse for not making one in the recent days. First, I’ve been sort of busy. Second, I did have a couple of attempts yet somehow either the blogger.com site had erased or the computer shut down for some reason. Hmm, I hope this isn’t one of them.
I also hope as well that this isn’t one of those blogs where I promise loads of things, and then end up not fulfilling them in the mere future.
So far, things have been going alright. Not swell, or spectacular, but enough excitement to sustain me from boredom. Yet I always wish for something more. But I could feel new emotions – it’s sort of hard to explain. It’s like, ‘Oh, I’ve been there before and I know what to do’. It’s the sort of feeling where you know where to hold back when you really need to.
My mom’s coming back to the Philippines soon. Arggh, I’m hoping for the best. I hope the bone scan comes out fine. I’m hoping of all my hopes at times, nonetheless when I actually feel like it. I mean, I sort of feel guilty that I don’t think about it more then I think I should have, like, I’m busy with my life. But during the times I have, it feels more stronger and real. Then distraction comes.
Studies. I think I made a few mistakes, but not big ones. I hope my report card comes out alright. Yet, I know I’ll get it way after the others have gotten theirs. Yeap, money problems. I don’t want it to be a huge issue, but still, I’ve been here quite a number of times and I know how it feels like. Keeping a secret like that. Again and again.
I don’t know. I’m not really happy with my environment. It has that feeling of usual, usual, you know? I mean, you feel comfortable with them but, after that, what happens? And what else? There’s too much freedom. I really want to use this time to focus on my studies as well. I learned knowledge, but you know, it’s like on my terms. My terms isn’t that restricted as much as I wanted it to be. A little concern has been bugging me that I won’t be able to adapt to college and all in the future. I want to be in an environment where there are individuals who at least have the decency to NOT write the answers on the desk during final examinations. Because that’s exactly what happened today. I mean, seriously, like EVERYONE. They take the advantage of not-strict teachers and twist their way around them to get grades they don’t deserve at all. Today, I’ve been tempted at a few times, but I’m proud to say that I finally overcome that. OK, as much as it hurts to say, even if I did get a lower or bad grade in any of those subjects (though my confidence has yet to be broken) at least I would have something to come off it. OK, it start to come off a bit harsh but still man. I wish someday they would still learn.
You’ll never know, I’m after you.
Love life = KA PLUNK. No guys that I’m remotely interested in. Well, the ones that I like don't notice me x(
Arggh. I don’t feel pretty. Did I mention my stomach has it’s own stomach? And my bangs make me feel…all blehhhh…
I better stop complaining and wasting computer space.
What I want to do?!
Continue reading Anne Frank and enriching my mind that hungers for knowledge.
My current song movie soundtrack. OK, I have an excuse for not making one in the recent days. First, I’ve been sort of busy. Second, I did have a couple of attempts yet somehow either the blogger.com site had erased or the computer shut down for some reason. Hmm, I hope this isn’t one of them.
I also hope as well that this isn’t one of those blogs where I promise loads of things, and then end up not fulfilling them in the mere future.
So far, things have been going alright. Not swell, or spectacular, but enough excitement to sustain me from boredom. Yet I always wish for something more. But I could feel new emotions – it’s sort of hard to explain. It’s like, ‘Oh, I’ve been there before and I know what to do’. It’s the sort of feeling where you know where to hold back when you really need to.
My mom’s coming back to the Philippines soon. Arggh, I’m hoping for the best. I hope the bone scan comes out fine. I’m hoping of all my hopes at times, nonetheless when I actually feel like it. I mean, I sort of feel guilty that I don’t think about it more then I think I should have, like, I’m busy with my life. But during the times I have, it feels more stronger and real. Then distraction comes.
Studies. I think I made a few mistakes, but not big ones. I hope my report card comes out alright. Yet, I know I’ll get it way after the others have gotten theirs. Yeap, money problems. I don’t want it to be a huge issue, but still, I’ve been here quite a number of times and I know how it feels like. Keeping a secret like that. Again and again.
I don’t know. I’m not really happy with my environment. It has that feeling of usual, usual, you know? I mean, you feel comfortable with them but, after that, what happens? And what else? There’s too much freedom. I really want to use this time to focus on my studies as well. I learned knowledge, but you know, it’s like on my terms. My terms isn’t that restricted as much as I wanted it to be. A little concern has been bugging me that I won’t be able to adapt to college and all in the future. I want to be in an environment where there are individuals who at least have the decency to NOT write the answers on the desk during final examinations. Because that’s exactly what happened today. I mean, seriously, like EVERYONE. They take the advantage of not-strict teachers and twist their way around them to get grades they don’t deserve at all. Today, I’ve been tempted at a few times, but I’m proud to say that I finally overcome that. OK, as much as it hurts to say, even if I did get a lower or bad grade in any of those subjects (though my confidence has yet to be broken) at least I would have something to come off it. OK, it start to come off a bit harsh but still man. I wish someday they would still learn.
You’ll never know, I’m after you.
Love life = KA PLUNK. No guys that I’m remotely interested in. Well, the ones that I like don't notice me x(
Arggh. I don’t feel pretty. Did I mention my stomach has it’s own stomach? And my bangs make me feel…all blehhhh…
I better stop complaining and wasting computer space.
What I want to do?!
Continue reading Anne Frank and enriching my mind that hungers for knowledge.
posted by Jellybean at 6:10 AM
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