Ordinary People..

i just found out that my one of my parent's friends might have committed suicide.
this was the worst news i ever received this year. it's so disturbing. i met tita and tito before at church but i never knew that they were capable of that. it didn't even cross my mind at all.
my heart goes out to them, especially the little children.
apparently, his airline company went bankrupt and he owed the bank quite a lot of money, compared to how much we owe to the bank. it made me realize a lot of things, but i don't really want to talk about it. i'm just so worried how they would cope with. imagine being on their shoes. first, it made me feel really lucky even though my family doesn't have it all.
i don't know, words sort of ruin the feeling if you're not using them correctly. so i guess i just have to leave at that.
gotta go back to doing whatever it is deemed 'important' right now.
** btw, i'm grounded. let's see how it goes for 6 months.
*** i got shouted at by my parents last night and lost around 1/2 of my water intake that night. my eyes looked like they were stung by a bee when i went to school today, plus with newly emerged zit.
**** i got to reform, as what my dad says.
let's just see how it goes. neither feeling positive nor negative, pretty neutral.
ahhh.
sometimes i hate what people think of me. especially my bestie. i don't know, whether we're in shaky ground or if its just me, that seems different from before. before i spilled one of my innermost secrets are something.
i dunno. i'll just keep this between me and you for now.
wait, since when it did it stop?
its always been like that.